“Dear Americans, Here is an important lesson for you to learn: There is no sport called ‘Soccer.’ The sport that was invented between the years 220 and 680 (yes, years with 3 digits do exist) is called Football. Nobody knows why you guys call a sport that was invented somewhat later (1869) and is played by motorbikers (that’s why they wear helmets, not so?) football. It’s neither played with the feet nor with a ball. If you called it American Rugby I am sure nobody would argue.”
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