Serious LGBT Thread

[Dr Heckyll]

here is an article i read on homosexuality in the GDR, very cool:

http://bostonreview.net/gender-sexuality/samuel-clowes-huneke-gay-liberation-behind-iron-curtain

interesting read, I always just assumed it was repression of gay people all throughout the warsaw pact

 

[tera]

Its a shame that you are unironically told stuff like that honestly.

I get its a vastly different culture for you guys over there though.

It is unfortunately, there's really that collectivist sort of lifestyle between considerable amount of families. For example, I have 11 uncles and aunties, all of which with different values and culture but nevertheless almost the same. I would say my own family is more of the type to be moderately religious and would often mind our own business (thankfully), I have some wack aunties and uncles who just only care for religion to be the main aspect of life and is opposed to western lifestyles. One of my aunts happened to have a gay son and I am not really sure of their relationship but from what I can tell, she still loved her son a lot but my other aunts and uncles despised him.

It's like, when he takes a seat at the couch where some of the aunts and uncles are, they immediately choose to get up from the sofa and talk somewhere else. Rarely, anyone talks to him and since he's like quite old, 30+ years old (since he was the son of the oldest sister in my family), it's usually as young lads, me, my cousins and whatnot that had some funny conversations with him. These aunts and uncles would often choose to talk shit behind his back, doing all of those gossip and stuff. The moment he got contracted himself some sort of illness, they all assumed he did it with some random strangers and caught a disease. I don't like majority of my aunts and uncles, they're just too damn judgmental and only care about religion and their self-righteousness.

 

[Powley]

whew so I had one of my regular customers try to ask me out tonight

honestly felt really bad turning him down, I get hit on a lot at work but it's usually creepy old men or douchebros being right cunts about it, but this guy was pretty genuine and it was fairly obvious he was nervous and it took a lot to build up the confidence

pictured; me telling him im a lesbian



why do i bother wearing a pride badge to work if im always going to get asked out by men anyway hhgnnghghhfuck

wait I thought you were dating Zak or did you guys break up or something?

 

[Akula]

wait I thought you were dating Zak or did you guys break up or something?

I dunno how much he likes discussing personal stuff on here but that was quite a while ago, I guess we both ended up realizing we were a lot better off as friends and a romantic relationship just wasn't what fit us

 

[Nömad <3]

What do you think, why is it a 'trend to be homosexual' in the year 201X+?

I would argue, in complete and utter honesty, because it's more accepted in the West. This isn't the 60's, 70's, 80's - there's legislation protecting people's freedom to love who they want and be with who they want in most developed nations and that's the big thing. People aren't being arrested for sodomy or being gay, the UK isn't making war heroes kill themselves via depressing female hormone therapy, and even with religious opposition or opposition in general that number has fallen to a minority in the last 4-5 years. In my opinion it's simply that with government legislation protecting people, they feel confident enough socially by seeing more and more gay people or such being open to finally be open themselves - it's like a looping effect.

When was "loving people with the same sex as yourself" began to rise in popularity?

Ever since guy A realized he liked guy B. People get into the whole greek and roman views on homosexuality in the wrong ways and i won't go into it here, but in the spirit of LOVEPOSTING the Greeks had nine words for love.

Spoiler: the love

And to answer your question properly in a modern context, homosexuality has always been a consistently resurging element of nearly every single culture - t's a universal human trait to those affected by it and a genuinely 'natural' occurrence. None of us chose to be gay or bi, probably took some of us by surprise to be admiring guys more and more as we grew up. The only reason why i say it became 'popular' was the same as my previous answer - social views on it changed and people in the west were more empowered by personal liberties and freedoms that they could make their voices heard to governments and society at large to change public opinion. It became 'popular' because people could finally openly say they were gay and protest and raise awareness without being sent to a mental asylum.

What do you think, why are people so open about it?

Because they finally have the freedom to and aren't judged as harshly as our parents or previous generations? Unfortunately if you repress emotions (like most people know) sometimes they fester and you don't feel good about them. You doubt, you question, you overthink, sometimes you get angry and standoffish. It's not mentally healthy to repress a part of who you are just because some people you believe may think less of you. I didn't come out to anyone period until last year and even then it was just casual acceptance, i hate making a big show of it. But feeling comfortable in your own skin is really, really important for a good sense of mental health. It's why hatred against Trans people is so fucking stupid imo because their actions aren't doing shit, it's just people trying to feel more comfortable in a skin they don't feel is theirs.

There's a reason why suicide rates with homosexuals and trans people are so high. You repress or deny someone the ability to be open and accept themself, those repressed thoughts turn really, really bad.

Do you think other people ever tried to convert you into liking the same sex?

Never, not once. But a lot of you in this thread have forgotten that it does happen. It's incredibly important to know some people grow up in situations where all they think is that they're gay or that they're pushed into it by really fucking nasty people, we can't just say they don't exist because homosexual tendencies are a natural human thing.

Let me tell you all a story please, about one of my best friends. I'll call him Calum for the sake of it.

Calum grew up very similarly to me just further away. Family of five, all straight besides him and perfectly accepting of him when he finally came out. His parents split and he stayed with most of his family near a big city. He gradually made more friends in the gay scene, got dragged more into it and found out he enjoyed it a lot and made an incredible amount of good friends, good experiences, and interests he enjoyed (even though the guy is lovely he's also your stereotypical 'jock' gay who loves quite a bit of kink, but to each their own he's still lovely). This continued for a good 5-6, almost 7 years, and Calum begins seeing issues with his body physically. Despite having a boyfriend he loves as a person he doesn't feel attracted to him in the same way he was before, he has incredibly conflicting sexual interests and feels like he may be having issues with dysfunction or mental stress and trauma making him feel how he is and stuff.

He goes to a doctor and goes in for all sorts of tests, they're trying to check if he's healthy physically and mentally because before this he was working 2 jobs and dealing with drama after drama, but it turns out not to be the case. Weirdly, Calum is straight, just with a lot of homoerotic tendencies (physically liking guys and his boyfriend, enjoying just being a big gay but gradually over the years feeling like more and more he wasn't feeling pure sexual attraction to men). First time i'd ever seen it, but as my friend i went to manchester, got him a drink, and we spent a night talking and patching old wounds for both of us in the process.

It's an incredibly tiny case, really doesn't speak for all gays and such, but he explained it as being introduced to the gay scene and enjoying it genuinely at 16-17, he got really into it and build up part of himself and a persona of himself with this view of himself in the gay scene as the centre. Only when he had issues and stepped away from it for some time did he realize that despite enjoying it, it wasn't 100% him. Sometimes it takes people time to realise what's different about them or if they're truly gay or just bi or bi-curious (like i know a few people who are genuinely straight who will still ask questions about gay or bi stuff, or call a gay guy cute. Hormones in the body make people think things and it's not something that's an issue, just people finding themselves).

Anyone who actually tries to take advantage of this bi-curious nature though or tries to "convert" people to being gay because they find it cute or they get sexual pleasure from the scenario or they're just a fucking EVIL cunt like a certain James we all know and hate, they are terrible shitty people because that's emotional manipulation and taking advantage of someone being unsure of themselves and others.

If so, What's your opinion in being forced to like the same sex?

refer to me previous answer, although in the context of being 'forced' i don't think that's the case, at all. And i know you mean nothing by it moonglow but a lot of the time it's moreso Gay people being forced to like the opposite sex, not the same sex. You see religion and social norms force people into repressing stuff like homosexuality, but never heterosexuality.

Have you ever considered going back to being heterosexual, even if you may think it's not possible?

I'm very happily bisexual, i just really, really like guys. It's not so cut and clear Moonglow my friend - people like who they like and they like the certain physical and emotional elements of both the gender of a person and the person themselves. Everyone who's gay or non-straight probably goes through a small crisis of asking if it's right, what will family think, what about family, is this really me, etc. That's natural. But if people are comfortably gay or pan or whatever, then that means they know what they like and they're not in question of it and that's good enough to leave there. Homosexuality is a naturally occurring genetic defect in humanity and other animal species, a being affected by it isn't just going to throw it away some day with no reason - my mate Calum took almost 7 years an after realizing it now he's a fucking mess trying to piece together back his life because his friends and the community he was in was his life. So possible? Just hard.

Why did you choose to be homosexual? Is that what you wanted? Did someone or something make you be that way?

I will refer you to all my previous answers moon <3 and rest assured i chose it, it was what i wanted. I was just lucky enough to have family accept it (eventually).

Spoiler: real talk

I know you mean well btw moon but asking someone why they 'chose' to be homosexual is a pretty good way to be called a bigot or slapped by fucking idiots. It can be a very rough spot for people especially if it took a lot of time for them to come out as gay or to simply be comfortable with their situation. Everyone goes gay because of something and someone: The something is genetics, hormones and realizing you're looking at guys differently, the someone is usually a crush you'd have never crushed on before. It's less choosing it like an arbitrary option in an RPG, more like just accepting it as part of who you are

Even though you are bisexual or homosexual, do you think against people with the same sexuality as you in case they do something wrong or inappropriate?

All the fucking time. @Goatson shares a lot of my ideas and i think a few people here might do, but i've been called a homophobe and a bigot before because i call people out on their shit. It might be genuinely shitty things they've done or just my opinion on a personal dislike of not fitting into gay stereotypes, but a lot of the time i'm not a proponent of the main gay rights movement or whatever, but if people are that's totally fine and i don't mind. I just feel like with the new surgence in identity politics if you're in an 'in' group or whatever you really, reallly need to fucking call people out on their shit when they're shitty.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

 

[Powley]

I dunno how much he likes discussing personal stuff on here but that was quite a while ago, I guess we both ended up realizing we were a lot better off as friends and a romantic relationship just wasn't what fit us

He doesn’t it’s just what I heard through the grape vine

 

[Akula]

He doesn’t it’s just what I heard through the grape vine

I think it's been almost a year which is a bit of a sobering thought honestly, time really flies.

But yeah, amicable breakup I guess, he's still probably my closest friend and not a day goes by I don't appreciate that, and the fact that trying a relationship didn't destroy that like it usually tends too

and if you're confused regarding sexuality back then I thought myself pansexual, but after some soul searching I figured that wasn't really the case, figuring out who I was was a bit of a rocky and long road, but I think where I am now feels just about right

 

[Nömad <3]

half expected this thread to turn into shit

really shows u the good side of nebuläe

God bless how everyone can change in the space of 8-10 months c:

 

[Powley]

I think it's been almost a year which is a bit of a sobering thought honestly, time really flies.

But yeah, amicable breakup I guess, he's still probably my closest friend and not a day goes by I don't appreciate that, and the fact that trying a relationship didn't destroy that like it usually tends too

and if you're confused regarding sexuality back then I thought myself pansexual, but after some soul searching I figured that wasn't really the case, figuring out who I was was a bit of a rocky and long road, but I think where I am now feels just about right

Do you mind if I ask you some questions that pick my mind

 

[Goatson]

All the fucking time. @Goatson shares a lot of my ideas and i think a few people here might do, but i've been called a homophobe and a bigot before because i call people out on their shit. It might be genuinely shitty things they've done or just my opinion on a personal dislike of not fitting into gay stereotypes, but a lot of the time i'm not a proponent of the main gay rights movement or whatever, but if people are that's totally fine and i don't mind. I just feel like with the new surgence in identity politics if you're in an 'in' group or whatever you really, reallly need to fucking call people out on their shit when they're shitty.

we are one mind in unison

 

[Akula]

Do you mind if I ask you some questions that pick my mind

I mean I guess it depends on what they are, and if they're related to Zak I'm not really sure I can answer for him

 

[tera]

Though just something I want to add on to my nation, Malaysia, the old boomers be like that shit (omegalol polygamy and child marriage is still ok in traditional states but not gay marriage LEL according to them overzealous boomers) but hey at least the young generation (atleast in my state) are rather accepting of LGBT, there's a lot of awareness that's going on especially around the young folk and is being spread by the more progressive folks as well through social media. There's always LGBT talks and whatnot that's usually happening in universities and in the general community. Which is a great thing really considering how its stated that being an LGBT can get you some jailtime here in malaysia but even then it's getting that shit is getting less and less enforced.

 

[Powley]

I mean I guess it depends on what they are, and if they're related to Zak I'm not really sure I can answer for him

Nah it’s more so about sexuality mate.

So to my understanding people go through the transformation to feel more comfortable in their skin, right?

So like, if you’re a guy who becomes a girl, who becomes a lesbian to be with girls. I guess that just confuses me, you know?

And I’m not trying to be harsh. Lick fanny, suck dick do whatever you want. I just don’t understand the need for the downstairs transformation at that part.

 

[Goatson]

Though just something I want to add on to my nation, Malaysia, the old boomers be like that shit (omegalol polygamy and child marriage is still ok in traditional states but not gay marriage LEL according to them overzealous boomers) but hey at least the young generation (atleast in my state) rather accepting of LGBT, there's a lot of awareness that's going on especially around the young folk and is being spread by the more progressive folks as well through social media. There's always LGBT talks and whatnot that's usually happening in universities and in the general community. Which is a great thing really considering how its stated that being an LGBT can get you some jailtime here in malaysia but even then it's getting that shit is getting less and less enforced.

not gonna lie fam seeing your country progress further and further in terms of personal freedoms and shit gives me a proper freedom boner

 

[Whilt]

Being gay is a “trend” because we actually get to keep our testicles now which is really cool and fun

 

[Nömad <3]

Though just something I want to add on to my nation, Malaysia, the old boomers be like that shit (omegalol polygamy and child marriage is still ok in traditional states but not gay marriage LEL according to them overzealous boomers) but hey at least the young generation (atleast in my state) rather accepting of LGBT, there's a lot of awareness that's going on especially around the young folk and is being spread by the more progressive folks as well through social media. There's always LGBT talks and whatnot that's usually happening in universities and in the general community. Which is a great thing really considering how its stated that being an LGBT can get you some jailtime here in malaysia but even then it's getting that shit is getting less and less enforced.

Slightly off the rails but mate i just spent 4 weeks working for an audit company and realizing just how fucked up Malaysia, Indonesia and China are about their people. Just casually using trafficked, forced and child labour, suppressing freedoms and stuff. It actually made me wanna read more into the state of Malay people and reading that the newer generation is doing a lil something about it is honestly so nice to hear. Honestly Tera never thought the country was so...interesting in regards to rights and views and stuff by just seeing you around the forums.

 

[surra]

i cant imagine how the lgbt is treated in saudi arabia, jeez, must be a lot worse from where i am and its pretty bad here as well for them.

The LGBT community is shunned by the community and killed by the state, no matter the case. if you were a man that loves men and police catches wind, you'll get executed and same goes for lesbians, and don't get me started on trans people

sadly it's how things are in the middle east, I've heard news of families reporting their son for being gay

 

[Rabid]

I'd like to add on to something you said @Nömad <3 - there are unfortunately people who do exploit these 'circles' (LGBT for example) for unsavoury reasons and it gives everyone a bad rap even if its about as far from the majority as you can possibly get. Its the same way you have certain absolutely disgusting groups (like MAP or NAP or whatever they're known as) trying to involve themselves and get in under the banner which skeeves everyone the fuck out.

 

[Akula]

Nah it’s more so about sexuality mate.

So to my understanding people go through the transformation to feel more comfortable in their skin, right?

So like, if you’re a guy who becomes a girl, who becomes a lesbian to be with girls. I guess that just confuses me, you know?

And I’m not trying to be harsh. Lick fanny, suck dick do whatever you want. I just don’t understand the need for the downstairs transformation at that part.

I mean funnily enough I never really felt any attraction to women until after I transitioned, prior I identified as a gay man

I couldn't really tell you why but being a lesbian just feels right now, though if I'm being honest my loss of attraction to men is partly due to a lot of abuse I've suffered in that regard, but also because I came to the realization that part of my attraction to men was just a fucked up way to "fit in" in a sense

I can't exactly give you any real explanation you'd probably understand, but I guess it just took a lot of digging until I found my true self, dramatic as that sounds

 

[Goatson]

I'd like to add on to something you said @Nömad <3 - there are unfortunately people who do exploit these 'circles' (LGBT for example) for unsavoury reasons and it gives everyone a bad rap even if its about as far from the majority as you can possibly get. Its the same way you have certain absolutely disgusting groups (like MAP or NAP or whatever they're known as) trying to involve themselves and get in under the banner which skeeves everyone the fuck out.

i could go on for hours about that topic and my country (nomad's heard everything from me regarding it already) but i dont wanna ruin the vibe here with it

keep the love gushing