havent slept in 4 days, dad's on the verge of just snapping, mom's a retard who still thinks i haven't passed the age of 5, haven't been able to see my friends since may, i've become paranoid over nothing, can't sleep ever, feel miserable everyday, fainted while walking out on the lawn for 3 hours today, no food in the house, no money for me to actually eat during the day and morning.
need to shave, everytime i try sleeping i end up with paralysis or a nightmare, can't go into a store without looking like a school shooter, members of my scout troop started distancing themselves from me specifically for no reason. i look like a slightly bigger version of slenderman with long as shit hair and a crippling social life. parent's are on the verge of disowning me. kidney disease signs are showing at an extremely young age, and thats bad considering half of my family has kidney disease. mom is also forcing me to go to trade school when i turn 16 instead of me doing what i want to do when i turn 18 because "i deem fit to be the new CEO to her A/C company when she retires!!!!!!" HOHOHOHO!
would you like to know why? because i'm the most "probable to violent acts" in this house, which makes zero sense because if i talk about my dad even badly here, you know i mention he throws tables at the walls when he gets angry at fucking world of warships.
fortunately all is not lost because i'm still using the last remaning medication i have to keep my mentally stable, and i've been working out more, eating healthier, but my emotional, social, and mental life has wound up in the shithouse.
when the fuck can i just take a bike ride and buy some boomer juice y'know what i mean?