Serious Medical/Mental Illness. Or a general well being thread

[Trains]

sorry to bump this thread

don’t read this if you don’t give a shit, i’m only posting here because i don’t really have anyone to tell

Spoiler: personal

so after nearly 2 years of my brother having some weird fucking mental issue which manifests mental stress into physical symptoms, he’s finally getting proper help. i won’t go into detail here, ask me directly if you want

he was meant to get help like a year ago but because mental health is pathetically underfunded it didn’t happen.

then we got lucky! then we didn’t! he was meant to be where he is now fucking months ago but because some prick decided to eat a bat it didn’t happen!

he’s a completely normal kid, but he’s been out of school for a while now and it’s holding him back from living his life. it’s been a very rough couple of years but HOPEFULLY things might start improving now.

it’s been rough on me and my family, on top of a lot of other things that have been going on which i cba to get into, but maybe now there’s a silver lining. maybe. idk, touchwood

i’ll spare you all the dramatic semantics, i’m not writing this for sympathy or attention or anything, it’s just nice to have put it down somewhere i guess. just don’t take the piss if we’re not friends x

yeah that’s all
love u all, this place has been my refuge while shit’s been going on lmao (not to say i’m leaving - i’m not going anywhere ;))

 

[Rabid]

sorry to bump this thread

don’t read this if you don’t give a shit, i’m only posting here because i don’t really have anyone to tell

Spoiler: personal

so after nearly 2 years of my brother having some weird fucking mental issue which manifests mental stress into physical symptoms, he’s finally getting proper help. i won’t go into detail here, ask me directly if you want

he was meant to get help like a year ago but because mental health is pathetically underfunded it didn’t happen.

then we got lucky! then we didn’t! he was meant to be where he is now fucking months ago but because some prick decided to eat a bat it didn’t happen!

he’s a completely normal kid, but he’s been out of school for a while now and it’s holding him back from living his life. it’s been a very rough couple of years but HOPEFULLY things might start improving now.

it’s been rough on me and my family, on top of a lot of other things that have been going on which i cba to get into, but maybe now there’s a silver lining. maybe. idk, touchwood

i’ll spare you all the dramatic semantics, i’m not writing this for sympathy or attention or anything, it’s just nice to have put it down somewhere i guess. just don’t take the piss if we’re not friends x

yeah that’s all
love u all, this place has been my refuge while shit’s been going on lmao (not to say i’m leaving - i’m not going anywhere :wink:)

Love you man, glad things are picking up x

 

[Clokr]

sorry to bump this thread

don’t read this if you don’t give a shit, i’m only posting here because i don’t really have anyone to tell

Spoiler: personal

so after nearly 2 years of my brother having some weird fucking mental issue which manifests mental stress into physical symptoms, he’s finally getting proper help. i won’t go into detail here, ask me directly if you want

he was meant to get help like a year ago but because mental health is pathetically underfunded it didn’t happen.

then we got lucky! then we didn’t! he was meant to be where he is now fucking months ago but because some prick decided to eat a bat it didn’t happen!

he’s a completely normal kid, but he’s been out of school for a while now and it’s holding him back from living his life. it’s been a very rough couple of years but HOPEFULLY things might start improving now.

it’s been rough on me and my family, on top of a lot of other things that have been going on which i cba to get into, but maybe now there’s a silver lining. maybe. idk, touchwood

i’ll spare you all the dramatic semantics, i’m not writing this for sympathy or attention or anything, it’s just nice to have put it down somewhere i guess. just don’t take the piss if we’re not friends x

yeah that’s all
love u all, this place has been my refuge while shit’s been going on lmao (not to say i’m leaving - i’m not going anywhere :wink:)

I have the exact same issue as your brother does. I know how scary it can be when you’re perfectly healthy one day and the next you just like loose all function of a hand or something.

Last year I had completely lost all use, feeling, and function of my right leg knee down. Like it was completely dead and I had to use a cane or drag it along behind me. Went to the ER and they did MRIs, xrays, all sorts of shit and they were all stumped. They thought there was a pinched nerve or there was something wrong with my brain. Then the doctor told me I’ve got that issue where stress causes physical symptoms. We still got no idea where it came from. Don’t know if it just came on or if it was caused by my TBI or C-PTSD.

But from experiencing it myself. A lot of times it won’t be too terrible. Just be sure to give him the usual amount of love you would any sibling. And just know that there’s nothing actually terribly wrong. Just the brain is missing a couple connected wires I suppose.

 

[Ibarra]

sorry to bump this thread

don’t read this if you don’t give a shit, i’m only posting here because i don’t really have anyone to tell

Spoiler: personal

so after nearly 2 years of my brother having some weird fucking mental issue which manifests mental stress into physical symptoms, he’s finally getting proper help. i won’t go into detail here, ask me directly if you want

he was meant to get help like a year ago but because mental health is pathetically underfunded it didn’t happen.

then we got lucky! then we didn’t! he was meant to be where he is now fucking months ago but because some prick decided to eat a bat it didn’t happen!

he’s a completely normal kid, but he’s been out of school for a while now and it’s holding him back from living his life. it’s been a very rough couple of years but HOPEFULLY things might start improving now.

it’s been rough on me and my family, on top of a lot of other things that have been going on which i cba to get into, but maybe now there’s a silver lining. maybe. idk, touchwood

i’ll spare you all the dramatic semantics, i’m not writing this for sympathy or attention or anything, it’s just nice to have put it down somewhere i guess. just don’t take the piss if we’re not friends x

yeah that’s all
love u all, this place has been my refuge while shit’s been going on lmao (not to say i’m leaving - i’m not going anywhere :wink:)

i love u

 

[bubblegum]

I’ve been struggling a lot lately with disordered eating ie anorexia and general stress making me feel like I’m losing my mind. :/

I might move soon which I hope improves how I feel.

 

[Clokr]

I’ve been struggling a lot lately with disordered eating ie anorexia and general stress making me feel like I’m losing my mind. :/

I might move soon which I hope improves how I feel.

I think moving can be a great and not so great experience. I’ve only ever moved once when I was hella young. But gettin to experience a new place can be real exciting dependin on the person and wether it’s a good place.

But I hope you can feel better soon enough. Shits been just too wild as of recently

 

[bubblegum]

I think moving can be a great and not so great experience. I’ve only ever moved once when I was hella young. But gettin to experience a new place can be real exciting dependin on the person and wether it’s a good place.

But I hope you can feel better soon enough. Shits been just too wild as of recently

thank you :c

I really hate being tied down to one place. Idk no place ever feels like home to me

 

[Clokr]

thank you :c

I really hate being tied down to one place. Idk no place ever feels like home to me

I do feel that tho. I’ve had times where I wanted to just take off at midnight, not tell anyone and just go to random places in or out of country. But I’ve got other things now like tryna finish up my schooling and take care of the folks. But I def think you could make a living just going around and around

 

[bubblegum]

I do feel that tho. I’ve had times where I wanted to just take off at midnight, not tell anyone and just go to random places in or out of country. But I’ve got other things now like tryna finish up my schooling and take care of the folks. But I def think you could make a living just going around and around

yeah I get the urge to change my name, color my hair, and leave the state without anyone knowing where I’m going lol. Maybe it’s like a psychological urge to feel more in control of my life?

 

[Clokr]

yeah I get the urge to change my name, color my hair, and leave the state without anyone knowing where I’m going lol. Maybe it’s like a psychological urge to feel more in control of my life?

I think it’s a natural human feeling to just want to be in control of everything in your life. Sometimes people love to just do what they want and not care for what anyone says about them or anything. And others like to have a set path or goal, like myself. All I can really say is just do what your heart tells you to, what it really says.

 

[aeromantis]

sometimes I wonder who I wronged in a past life to be blessed with existing

it's been a consistent trend that anything good that happens to me will leave or be undone either by my own stupidity or sheer shitty luck.

I've moved away from every friend I had back in february... I've always been a loner due to me being a generally unpleasant person to be around, but I had a few close friends that I hung out with on occasion, and I treasure the time I had with them, despite it feeling like they were tolerating me at times. but now I have no where to hide from myself.

I've been an asshole to people both here and off community, you know who you are, and I'm sorry to everyone that's been affected by my insecurity, I have no excuse to give.

shit is spiralling, no one will hire me and I'm fast approaching my overdraft limit.
wonder what happens when I hit rock bottom...

a lot of you here made shit tolerable and I was blind when I thought leaving would help, it just made things a whole lot fucking worse
shout out to everyone who helped me feel better, even if it was for a brief moment in time.

I had to get this out somewhere, I have no where else
thank you for listening

 

[Sil]

sometimes I wonder who I wronged in a past life to be blessed with existing

it's been a consistent trend that anything good that happens to me will leave or be undone either by my own stupidity or sheer shitty luck.

I've moved away from every friend I had back in february... I've always been a loner due to me being a generally unpleasant person to be around, but I had a few close friends that I hung out with on occasion, and I treasure the time I had with them, despite it feeling like they were tolerating me at times. but now I have no where to hide from myself.

I've been an asshole to people both here and off community, you know who you are, and I'm sorry to everyone that's been affected by my insecurity, I have no excuse to give.

shit is spiralling, no one will hire me and I'm fast approaching my overdraft limit.
wonder what happens when I hit rock bottom...

a lot of you here made shit tolerable and I was blind when I thought leaving would help, it just made things a whole lot fucking worse
shout out to everyone who helped me feel better, even if it was for a brief moment in time.

I had to get this out somewhere, I have no where else
thank you for listening

I hope you're doing well my man, and I mean it.

Think of it like this: if you hit rock bottom, the only way to go is up. Even though obviously it'll be a bad position, each position afterwards will always be a little bit better.

 

[Clokr]

wonder what happens when I hit rock bottom...

I can’t say what happens when you hit rock bottom. Because it’s different from all of us. But you’ll most definitely know when you hit it. I never believed it could happen to me but then I faced it myself and shit my pants.

Most important thing of all is to not allow it the pleasure of situating itself inside of your brain. It’s very easy to let it yet also very difficult to try and get rid of it at the same time. Find things to do that can allow you to keep away from that ending. As long as it does not inflict physical harm or is illegal. Do what you have to to stay out of there. So many people here, including myself have hit it. And it’s terrible.

When I hit rock bottom myself, that’s when I became an alcoholic and addict, as well as hurt everyone I once knew physically or mentally. Even sometimes it’s not as obvious as that. You’ll unknowingly hurt people you care for the most.

Please, take care of yourself first and foremost. I didn’t and it fucked me up for life. Do whatever you have to. You matter more then others. You can’t fix relationships when you fucked yourself over permanently vs. taking time for yourself then fixing those same relations when you’re at a good point to do

 

[Clokr]

Can we cancel cancer please

Pops had eye surgery the other day. Results came back that his cancer has returned. So much for remission

 

[bubblegum]

Not sure if anyone cares to read or whatever, but if you wanna here you go. Kinda nervous to unload but I have no one to really vent to.

Spoiler: whole lot to unpack

I've been feeling so fucking exhausted and tired. My mental health has been taking a nose dive since all this COVID shit. I've been isolating myself from people recently and just in general feeling absolutely fucking awful. Been feeling suicidal too, as well as self harming by starving myself. These past few months I feel like I haven't really been myself. And when I get like this I get so morose and paranoid about like how others feel about me, so I just push people away if I feel they don't really like me. It's difficult being broken. I wish I could be more optimistic but with all that's going on in the world it's really fucking hard to be.

Baggage aside, I have a move in 6 months and I did the practice test for a college there, and really bombed the math part. It made me feel so stupid and inadequate. But I guess I do perfect in reading and writing. I'll attribute that to be being such an RP nerd. I really hope I can find what I need over there. I'm vaguely sorta optimistic of the future.

My psychiatrist wont call in my fucking ADHD meds and I have none left. I've called like 10 times lmao.

Can we cancel cancer please

Pops had eye surgery the other day. Results came back that his cancer has returned. So much for remission

I'm so sorry :s the same happened to my grandma

 

[Clokr]

Baggage aside, I have a move in 6 months and I did the practice test for a college there, and really bombed the math part. It made me feel so stupid and inadequate

Oh I wouldn’t really worry too much about that my friend. I still can’t even do any mental multiplication with any number over 12. And I pretty much failed every single math class I had. School actually thought I was mentally retarded which wasn’t really nice of them. But hey, beat the shit you’re good at and go ahead and shit on the shit you’re not.

But yeah. I can’t really do much to try and give you any direction. We all go through them shitty ass dips out of the blue sometimes. Best I can suggest really is just try and keep your mind occupied and do other things around the house maybe when you can. It’ll at least keep you occupied for that time.

 

[Ibarra]

I'm trash at math so I'll join that boat with you, I either failed my math classes too or passed by the bare minimum or had to do after school stuff, still bad at it now. You're not stupid or inadequate, far from it.

Try chilling to white noise or a guided meditation, lay down with some headphones plugged and let the rest take it's course. Fingers crossed for that college of yours, have no doubt you'll do great.

p.s: your psychiatrist sucks

 

[Deleted member 3818]

Fuck the school system for real, if you aren't either socially or academically gifted you're garunteed to have a shit time. I wonder a lot about how much better my life could be if my school wasn't so trash and actually allowed me to pursue my interests.

 

[Isuckatgaming]

bad at math gang rise up

there are dozens of us... I think, idk i couldn't do the calculations

 

[echs dee]

I don't know how to even start this.
It's my first time ever asking for advice(?)

Spoiler: personal?

I have troubles speaking often.
It tends to happen in situations i uh
feel embarrased, or stressed. i don't really know if this is a real issue
since 100% people i know dont have problems with it.
i worry that everybody i know dislikes me, or is against me
i doubt myself many times, if that counts